Recently, a newly diagnosed friend asked me how I dealt with losing so many parts of my life without disengaging emotionally. It was a weighty question, one that I needed several hours to ponder and properly answer, mostly because I am continually processing the Lupus-related loss in my life. One of my answers felt almost too silly to write down, although it was, during my darkest days, one of the strongest lifelines I had at the time. That lifeline was this book:
At the time, I was numb, over-medicated, physically broken, and the most alone I have ever felt in my life. This book eased the loneliness, gave me a place of refuge, and started the slow journey back to hopeful and positive thinking. Engaging in Kay’s fantasy world allowed me to escape my current circumstances, while opening the door for me to look at my own life.
I think it’s important to have an escape, even if it’s for 10 minutes everyday, whether it be reading, cooking, drawing, knitting, DIY projects, going for a walk, etc. Your illness or personal issues should not be allowed to take over your entire life. Healthy, mind-focused, productive escape gives perspective, it reminds you that you are not your problem or illness, that there is so much more to you than that. It can create the space and the energy you need to re-engage with your life.
Escape is the way in.
Fionavar Tapestry made me reflect on the solitary journey each of us must take when trying to reclaim our will and spirit to carry on. Finding that will is the starting point to everything; to healing, to giving a damn, to getting through those times when there is no one there to help you decide, move on, or let go. At the end of the day, it all comes down to you. You are the hero you have been looking for.
What was the lifeline that helped you re-engage in your life story? Send me a comment and share your great escape. I’d love to hear about it!