Every time I sit down to write about “The Big 9,” I stop a few words in. I can’t do it. I can’t sum up the lessons of the last 9 years into “9 easy-to-follow bullet points.” That’s pretty arrogant and ridiculous.
I’m in process. Processing. No concrete conclusions here.
I’ve decided I don’t want to think about what I’ve learned in the last 9 years of my Lupus Life. I want to think about the walk I’m going to take tomorrow, the cozy glow of my bedside lamp, of tonight’s sharing of sushi, smiles and stories with a favourite keeper. Let’s take a pause on all this “reflecting” bullshit. It gets way too heavy. I’m ready to lighten things up.
So, I’ll take my pills and wait it out like a good “patient” girl. I’ll keep hope in my pocket. It’ll warm my yellow Raynaud hands, so I can hold my cups of tea. It’s a strange, little life I have with my cheeky, hyperactive immune system. The cheekiness doesn’t stop here. There is more to come, but not right now.
Not right now.